It's Not All About the Scale

To my astonishment I've lost 3.5" this week... My inches continue to move even though I have not done well on protocol this round nor has the scale moved much in my favor. I continue to move down in inches even though I know - and so do all of you I have tried to sabotage this round. I'm conscious of this fact which has made it all the more frustrating! I start with the counselor tomorrow to start uncovering - however painful it may be, the reasons why deep down in my subconscious I get to this weight, fairly close to being out of the 200's and I stop myself. I have my book to delve into but need to gather my supplies to take my journey to total wellness, wholeness and finally be a complete and healthy person.

I've already shared some of what I think it might be - one more thing it could be is my one and only serious relationship I had was when I weighed about 180 lbs and he cheated on me and left me. So, back to the abandonment issues - could this be what it all stems from? I really don't know - but it is what I suspect. The question is how do I get past it and deal with the reality of not all men are like that - that I am worth being loved for who I am no matter what size I am. Realize that if I'd been 500lbs the same thing could have happened or if I was 135lbs. It happens all the time in this world. So, the journey begins tomorrow! My journey to a whole new me in every aspect. A healed me! The HCG is just one small aspect of the whole picture of my journey to wellness. I have the mental, emotional, physical and spiritual aspects to balance and align. And right now I am definitely out of balance...

Please continue to pray for my neighbor - she is having surgery Thursday morning at 8:00 AM PST.

That's all for now folks!